Um…. yeah, this post was meant to be posted months ago…. so…. okay. And thanks to Drifty for nagging me to post something, because my blog was dying.
Continuing on with my new trend of laughing at the messed up things I did when I was younger, I give you "The Mystery of the Ancient Fountain of Dreams", an RM2K3 game I made. Yes, the title is longer than the legal limit. Anyway, I was looking through it the other day because that was just the thing I was doing and I found some pretty stupid things in it that really made me LOL.
Warning: This game is based around the Kirby universe and contains aspects from certain Kirby games. If you have an aversion to Kirby *cough*Drifty*cough*, you may not be interested. But then again, you may be.
The game starts out by asking you what you’d like your name to be. Don’t know why it does this as during the entire game, you are referred to as "Kirby Star." A short movie then plays which was terribly made and consists of only 5 frames that last about a minute each. Weird. Plus, it makes a incredibly bad ASOUE-reference in the fourth frame by trying to relate two completely unrelated things.
You then wake up on a mountain cliff. What the negative? What’s worse is that the mountain cliff is called the "Drian of Peace." I must have been on drugs. There’s a soldier-guy standing there and if you walk by him, he tells you (after you call him "handsome") that the "Sultina of Drivsalkanty" wants to see you. Wowwwwwww. I was really bad with names, apparently. And "Sultina"? Is it just me or does that sound like a rasin? Plus, if you talk to that soldier from the side instead of walking in front of him, he says "OLA AMIGO."
The Sultina looks like a nun. But the conversation follows very casually, from Kirby’s "Doy, I do!" response to a question to the Sultina’s todo list for Kirby: "Find the Fountain. Defeat Nightmare. BOOM. Dreamland saved." Weird. Also funny is this short snippet: Kirby asks "Oh my gosh, are you serious?" and the "Sultina" says "Does this face look unserious to you?" Besides that not actually being a word, the face next to the text doesn’t actually look that serious.
The Sultina also gives you a sticker which she says will make the King of "Drinia" trust you. Wow. A sticker. If you walk a mile northwards of her house, you can find the King guarded by one stupid guard. Actually, you can only see the King’s mustache and below. He’s too high up on the screen so most of his face got cut off. The King then will sell you stuff. He’s a King, but he’s selling you stuff. Weiiiird.
Next, there’s a pyramid to the west with "Nightmare" in it. You have to battle him. He’s pretty hard. After you beat him, he screams "Nooo!!!! How could you beat me? I will be back! Yes! Very very soon!" He vanishes and these random Kirbies appear, to which Kirby tells them that falling asleep on a mountain cliff made him want to take a vacation at a resort. WTN.
Two weeks later, Kirby’s lounging around at Rainbow Resort and weird stuff happens. Kirby goes to bed and starts talking to someone who’s not there. Suddenly, the walls freak out and Kirby gathers his imaginary friends to go do battle with Meta Knight. They appear in this random (carpeted) outdoor area that is full of petrified fountains, barrels of who-knows-what and beds (like in Superhero Movie lul). Not only that, but there are also spastic boulders and strings of rocks moving southward like snakes. Kirby then stands on a random square and gets shot by Meta Knight. Therefore, he is not in any of the ship scenes.
Kirby’s friends somehow get onto Meta Knight’s ship and one is making faces into a camera. Wait a minute, that’s not a camera, IT’S A CANNON. The scene changes to a diliapitated room where a hostage conversation takes place, but there is no one there. Plus, there is a random boat that looks like it’s in water but it’s actually on the floor and the floor is messed up with random tiles. And at the end of the conversation, fog fills the room. Plasma Kirby then battles this random thing that I cannot identify (though my siblings insist on calling it "Yogi Bear")
Scene cuts to the main deck where Dark Matter shouts "Release the main weapon!" after which it starts snowing. Dark Matter and Nightmare merge to form "Dark Nightmare", which, for some reason, looks like a hybrid of a dragon and a clown (in chipset). In battle, it looks like…. I don’t know. Really weird. After you defeat him, he shouts "NO! YOU CANNOT DEFEAT ME!" Meta Knight then fuses with the thing to form "Meta Knightmare" which looks like the Grim Reaper (in chipset).
Then the scene cuts to a random Kirby running in place in the carpeted Sleepy’s commercial from above. Then it cuts back to the ship. Random. There is a battle and stuff. After the battle, the scene cuts to a random building that looks like it’s in the middle of a desert. The Kirbies are all in it, talking. Most of them are in a row except for one who’s looking at them all and one who’s randomly standing in the bottom-right corner. I like to call him "Time-Out" Kirby, because he looks like he’s having a time out. lol.
There’s some strange scenes after that and then Kirby returns to the "Ancient Fountain of Dreams" to re-battle Nightmare and then the game goes into OMG Destiny! After that, there’s battle, and then the "credits". I always had this thing about making the Credits of my games a big deal. This…. wasn’t my best effort. Especially considering the extremely high number of copyright mistakes I made. I’m pretty sure I didn’t create Kirby and Nightmare :). There’s a lot of lawsuit-factor in there :).
Anyway, yes, it’s really random and quite funny at times. I thought that if anyone was interested in playing, I’ll put it up for download. Because it’s RM2K3-based, it requires Windows. However, there’s a walkaround! If you are running Linux (preferably Ubuntu), this game has been tested with
wine and it works fine. The only problems are a) the background music doesn’t work and b) the video at the beginning of the game causes WINE to crash. To get around this, you can load Save File 1 which puts you right after the video has ended.
Anyway, download TMOTAFOD here! You know that was an abbreviation, riiight? Also, because this game has a lot of battling in it (I don’t like the battling), I added a little cheaty. When you go to the "Sultina"’s house, talk to her bookcase and you’ll automatically grow to level 99. That way, you can skip the battles with little difficulty and focus on the (probably unintended at the time) comedy aspect of the game.
EDIT: Several people (read: two people) reported recieving an error when trying to download the game and I had no clue what the problem was until…. I realized I had mispelled TMOTAFOD. I put a T a the end instead of a D. Sorreh! I’ve updated the link now so you should be able to download. Thanks!