azhdrake: Realized half way to the bus stop that my shirt buttons were one level off from the shirt's holes 😔 toothpastecanyon: Noooo I’ve done that toothpastecanyon: 😔 hatkirby: Lol hatkirby: gotta get undressed in public to fix it hatkirby: no other way hatkirby: btw i've never seen a bathroom before and my kidneys are exhausted from 100 years of labor azhdrake: I mean, I have an undershirt hatkirby: you have to take that off too hatkirby: i don't make the rules azhdrake: Fxrdtguhigdt gasmasque: Yeah someone named Hatkirby does toothpastecanyon: Djdjdjdjd hatkirby: cause like what if your undershirt gets slightly scrunched up under the effort of shifting around the buttons and it's kind of uncomfortable
gasmasque: Here at Tau we’re discovering new ways to be homosexual, here’s our lead researcher Star now gasmasque: Star, say something about our research for the people back at home hatkirby: Thank you Gas! Yes, audience, I've been really trying to push the homosexual envelope here. I've been doing things such as 1) thinking about dick 2) thinking about balls 3) thinking about BOTH at the same time 4) thinking about TOUCHING them even hatkirby: Let me tell you I've been getting some great results gasmasque: Now I know thinking about TOUCHING them sounds dangerous folks, but Star here is a professional gay boy gasmasque: He knows his penises
hatkirby: it's tired of waiting hatkirby: you must fill the void hatkirby: i swear i don't mean this in a sexual way even though it's me saying it hatkirby: i just mean like lol... yknow like, getting consumed by the emptiness within you, letting that void stretch and envelope everything you've got piece by piece until you have nothing else and it still yearns for more toothpastecanyon: :owo: toothpastecanyon: oh yes I love that azhdrake: And also you should shove a dick in there hatkirby: well if I throw myself in, i'll do it dick first, are you happy hatkirby: cause i am 🥰
swbookworm: foreshadowing/wraparound jokes becoming plot points my beloved azhdrake: Hell yes azhdrake: occom's brick swbookworm: lcjlzdfjkldjfdg swbookworm: e x a c t l y azhdrake: fUCK *Chekhov's* Brick swbookworm: i mean occams brick too. i WILL make things go very wrong for them and it WILL NOT be subtle swbookworm: no wait swbookworm: thats fuckin. the other one azhdrake: Yeah but it won't be in reference to a joke told half the story ago. Or maybe it will be! swbookworm: MURPHYS BRICK swbookworm: FUCK azhdrake: *MURPHYS BRICK* azhdrake: If a joke can come back to haunt you, it will go wrong
TurboMaya9000: seeing you type for so long told me you were cooking something TurboMaya9000: didnt expect to be an entire screen worth of text ihnn: You should know me better than that by now
hatkirby: Oh, is this my new work computer? Yeah they emailed me telling me I had to get a new one within two weeks. bwoka: Is the old one Intel? [company] probably wants us to get the new Macs because they are better at handling a second monitor with Meet on it. toothpastecanyon: ??? Meat?? hatkirby: MEET, like, video calling for work. toothpastecanyon: [laughing] Oh, I thought- hatkirby: [also laughing] Yeah I perfectly envisioned what you heard and it is funny toothpastecanyon: I was like obviously you had to get a new computer for that. hatkirby: Yeah, I mean, they knew I had a second monitor. And they knew it had meat on it. toothpastecanyon: ... toothpastecanyon: [starts cracking up even harder] hatkirby: WAIT NOT THAT KIND OF MEAT